Personal Development Mentor, Parenting Coach, Career Counselor, Ethical Guide
What we are at present — at any stage of life and at any age at the present juncture— can not be changed. Time past is gone for good, whatever you experienced all through the bygone years is permanent and you can do nothing about it — that is you can not change it. But you can utilise those years and the journey that that you had undergone till now to fashion your remaining future. And definitely the future of your children and that of the grandchildren for sure!
Firstly it is very important to benefit from hindsight. Secondly we must understand that, as the title of one book that I came across says,”What got you here will not take you to where you want to go” more or less in these words. What it means is that you can not rest on your laurels and must find newer heights to conquer so that you remain relevant and useful in ever evolving world.
So let’s examine what do you find lacking in yourself at any identified stage.
You may find that you are outdated as far as the lingo and technology being used by your children or juniors/ younger persons in particular.
You will definitely find newer methods of dressing, hobbies and entertainment standards which may seem superfluous like piercings, tattoos and harmful habits like doing drugs etc as fashion accessories.
You will find that interests of the newer citizens will be much different from you and you will generally find yourself out of tune with the new generation.
And to add to you nightmare you may discover that that the ethical standards and social norms have also changed for the worse.
YOU MAY FIND YOURSELF TO BE A STRANGER IN YOUR OWN HOME!!!
In such moments of psychological crisis, it is important to maintain your poise and in silent contemplation you must acknowledge that you are a link from your ancestors to the next generation to introduce them smoothly in to the new world order. Don’t panic and remember that your parents would also have panicked when you became a teenager and when you got busy with your own career, married life and putting the children through school and college.
IT IS A RITE OF PASSAGE —-Nothing Else!!!
So rejoice in your good fortune and guide the youngsters as much as you can. Try and leave good memories, educative writings and solid character qualities to remember and cherish, to remain steadfast to good old humane values learnt at the knees of your parents and grandparents. Do ensure that you endeavour to ensure you bequeath the same values in a changed social context to your children and grand children — PASS IT ON!!! Apart from the gene pool these are also necessities and God given duty to do — Lets not fail the Supreme Power that gave us our existence!!! Moreover we must acknowledge that our children are not ours to own but independent souls entrusted to our care for nurturing and making them strong. Make them strong, because as Frederick Douglass once said,” it is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men”
Maj Gen Balraj Mehta believes there are no problems – only opportunities!
He is a veteran of Indian Army with 35 years of dealing with men – ranging from young recruits to grizzly old soldiers. Father of two handsome boys and a loving husband and married for over three decades. He has extensive knowledge of human nature, relationship and camaraderie . He has been conditioned by formal training and observation to deliver tangible, targeted and top line solutions to all kinds of parenting and career opportunities.